I haven’t had a job in a typical workplace for many years.
It’s always confused as to why the is so much drama amongst work colleagues and associates.
I remember a few years ago I hired a beautiful young girl to work for me. I said to her from day one that as long as the work got done I want us to have a good time and enjoy ourselves.
It’s just always made sense to me and I often wonder why it isn’t more common place.
For the majority of us we spend many hours, years, if not most of our lives in a job, so I have never understood as to why we wouldn’t want to make it anything else than enjoyable?
Let’s be real. It’s a part of life, whether it’s for a short or long time, for a passion, or simply to make ends meet. We are all more similar than different as humans. At the core level we want to be healthy, happy, and ensure our loved ones are the same, while making the best of our lives.
Yet then we still make each other miserable. I don’t believe it to be intentional. Number one, hurt people hurt people. But if we are to spend most of our weeks in a workplace community why would we not want to make it nice for everyone. I mean the work gets done, the hours get logged, regardless, so doesn’t it make more sense to make the choice as a community to at least have a good time?
I mean the outcome is the same.
Job gets done. Everyone is miserable.
Job gets done. Everyone is happy.
Why do we all feel we need that one specific purpose in life?
Why do we all feel we need that one specific purpose in life?
Could it maybe be that we have many purposes that grow, change or evolve over our lifetime?
It’s a common theme. Especially in the self development and spiritual world, to find that one single magical thing in life that will bring you passion and meaning, but what if for the majority of us we simply don’t just have one?
Once we become aware of the bigger picture, when that ‘shift’ comes at a point in our lives where we all of a sudden see the world through a different lens, some call it awakening, some consciousness, some awareness etc, there is a period of searching for new information and understanding.
At some point we often end up at the idea that we all have a unique purpose of that one gift to the world, and if we could only just ‘find it’ or pinpoint that one thing we could live a life filled with joy and meaning. This in itself, while intentions are good, often becomes a distraction dominated by overwhelm, confusion and at times feelings of helplessness which leads to us getting 'stuck'..
The more I started to read and hear about the importance and freedom of finding this life giving purpose, the more I struggled. I mean what exactly is that one single thing I’m born to do? You know, forever?
What I came to understand over time is that there doesn’t have to be one singular purpose, and in fact for most of us we have many over the course of our lifetimes and across the different parts of our life. We don’t need to be defined by a specific action or behaviour.
There are many moments and areas in our life that give necessary things and beauty to the world of one person, or the world as a whole, AND we can feel great joy and ‘purpose’ in those moments.
Instead of the frustrating and somewhat limiting idea of finding that one thing we have to offer, wouldn’t it make more sense to simply find not only what adds value and helps others, but also what makes you feel good and passionate about at any given moment of your life?
We often focus so much on the ‘grandiose’, that we forget that there are no set rules to how we all reach a life of purpose. Maybe for most of us we don’t have that one thing we just ‘knew’ from a young age that was ‘meant’ for us. Maybe for the most of us we have many different purposes that will change over time and allows to contribute to the world more than one singular gift.
We all get so tied to an identity and the overwhelm of that one thing we are supposed contribute to the world. Isn't this just another form of distraction to keep us from doing things that truly matter?
What if your current idea of your ‘purpose’ and the attachment to that identity is actually holding you back from your purpose?
Why is ‘pretty’ considered such an achievement?
Why is ‘pretty’ considered such an achievement?
Being back and more engaged on social media it’s really apparent that for the most part, those considered to be the quintessential 'beautiful people' and with the ideal 'perfect bodies' are so very highly valued in society and really worshipped by the majority.
Scrolling through the discovery pages of Instagram it’s filled with so many perfect photos of women who obviously work really hard on being pretty and meeting those standards of what is considered desirable.
It’s like there is so much effort and energy placed on looking good externally and ensuring they are noticed and liked based on their perceived value, their looks. And you can clearly see as a population for most women that is what they consider their most important asset (whether they agree or acknowledge it), their appearance.
It seems like a disproportionate number of women online don't care to be seen as smart, educated, intelligent and of any value beyond their appearance. There is very little effort in writing or sharing information of valuable conversation because that takes the same focus, time and effort, which of course could be better spent looking good.
I don’t say this in judgement but simply something I have noticed when looking at what is available on Instagram in search of interesting new pages to engage with. The value we have as women is almost always our looks as a priority. The feedback and recognition is also extremely obvious. No matter how good the quality of a post or content, there is no comparison to a pretty picture. I have tested this years ago with my own profiles and content. Nothing I write could ever compare to the engagement and adoration I get from looking pretty or showing my body.
Even with all the promotion of women’s empowerment and the sharing of these types of messages, it’s still very apparent we largely do not as females regard our minds and what we contribute to the world more than we do how pretty we are. Filters, editing tools, 'on trend' fashion, perfect poses and beautiful social media grids with the focus first on foremost about being acknowledged on how pretty we are is so obviously important.
What if moving forward we all searched instead for great content and valuable insight as opposed to the perfect picture?
What if moving forward we spent minimal time on looking so pretty and getting the perfect photo and more time seeking out useful information and sharing our minds and experiences?
What if we invested more time in who we are as opposed to what we looked like?
What if you never reach your goals?
What if you never reach your goals?
We have so much expectations on literally everything we do these days.
It must make us famous, popular or it must make us money…and right now.
Of course there is nothing inherently wrong with wanting these things, the problem lies in that we have forgotten about the beauty of being engaged in life.
Imagine if you took the risk, you faced the fear of ridicule and rejection, and took action on something that you loved and that you were passionate about.
Imagine if you could wake up every single day excited about something that made you feel inspired.
What if you never reached your goal?
Wouldn’t the joy of being simply being pumped about something each day and having something to look forward to be worth it?
Why do we always have to make it about whether we reach the goal or not?
Shouldn’t the real goal be to have fun and actually live an engaged life even if it didn’t work out exactly how you planned it in the end?
Wouldn’t it be worth the risk to avoid a boring, stuck, uninspired, bitter, sad, envious life, to instead actually feel like you have a vision or an idea that may just work out in the end?
This Is 40.
40.
This is 40 done my way✌️
🌸No kids- because I just simply haven’t had enough of a burning desire to have them, and refuse to follow the expectations of society that as a female you should have kids, and also feel that maybe one day my purpose may possibly be more tied to fostering (still considering all options with no stress or attachments as I trust everything will work out perfectly in the end☺️).
🌸No mortgage or home- because I simply haven’t found anywhere yet I feel I want to be tied to, and I love the freedom to ‘just go’, and also don’t buy into the idea that owning your own home is the ‘Australian dream’.
🌸No debts (anymore😉)- because I have no desire to ruin my life with the stress of money just to have materialistic ‘stuff’ that I don’t need simply to show others, or because society tells me that’s what makes me successful; or will mislead me to think these things will make me happy.
🌸No fancy cars, expensive clothes, shoes, bags or jewellery (been there, done that🤪)- because I’d prefer to have savings, invest in businesses that generate freedom, create memories and experiences in my life through travel and adventure because that is of way more value and will bring me real lasting happiness.
🌸No standard job or following my professional degrees- tried that and it simply wasn’t for me. Prefer to work for myself and choose what I’m worth and be paid for the effort I give with no limits through my own businesses or companies.
The way I live my life isn’t ‘right’, but it is perfect for me.
I don’t buy into other people’s dreams and goals.
I don’t follow the path that society tries to push on me.
Nor do I allow myself to be manipulated to believe the thoughts and ideas from other people’s ‘perspective’ of the world are ‘the way it should be done’.
I also don’t buy into the ageist bullshit that is projected onto women mostly through consumerism which is designed to brainwash women into thinking they need to ‘hide’ their age or ‘fix’ themselves.
Since turning 40 and speaking to others in general conversation, people have been positively surprised by my attitude as everyone else is generally so pessimistic about getting older.
You see my perspective since turning 40 has been ‘OMFG I literally have another 40 years (potentially🤞) to do whatever the fuck I want in my life’. I have soooo much time, unless for some reason I’m pulled from this earth early lol, to try new things, explore, adventure, play, have fun, learn, start a new career, study, and experience new things.
I had 40 years to achieve all my goals from my 20’s through to my mid 30’s, and now in the past year I have had a bit of ‘time out’ away from what I have ‘always done’ personally.
I now have a WHOLE ANOTHER 40 YEARS, but this time with a WHOLE truckload more wisdom to achieve it all with.
I mean seriously, how much better does it get than that?
40.
(PS And huge shout out and cheers to my Dad who said “Happy Birthday, welcome to the best years of your life, 40-60”…he is always and forever a legend and a total badass who never followed the rules and lived one hell of a cool life)
Thoughts
When Marcus and I were driving home from Canberra the other week along the highway amongst farm and bush land, the sky caught my attention in a whole new way.
Nature really is beautiful and it truly shows us how we as humans should be. Hustle and bustle and traffic and racing around in the mornings and nights isn’t the way we are supposed to work.
It was around 5.45pm and the sun was coming down. We were out in nature driving through the highway around dusk and I said to Marcus ‘wow nature really has it all laid out for us if we chose to open our eyes and see it’.
The sky gets kind of misty and smoky and essentially it becomes calming. It’s like it signals the moment of time before night fall to slow down and find calm.
It’s the same in the mornings. But the energy and the way the sun rises is completely different. It’s bright and awaking. Like it’s saying, time to energise and get going. Let’s do this. The complete opposite to the afternoon.
It made me think about how many people miss this and a lot of the reason why I believe we feel so stressed, rushed and overwhelmed. We don’t allow ourselves (and I understand for some who can’t depending on jobs) time to acknowledge and stay in sync with our natural environment. We are kind of going against our natural connection to the world around us. Trying to go so after our society’s manufactured world that we become so out of alignment with the real world. It’s just not meant to be that way.
I'm not here to, and I can’t give you the answers on how to bring about a more joyful and harmonious life, but what I will say is that at the end of the day we all have a choice. We just need to be flexible and how we find that place. It won’t be the same for everyone, but don’t underestimate the importance of actually living life.
I think we tend to sacrifice the beauty of what our lives could be as we have and want to much stuff we don’t need. There is always an alternative once you make the decision to live the life you dreamed of🌻
“I don’t know what my purpose is.”
“I don’t know what my purpose is.”
This is one of the most common things people struggle with and what creates a big barrier to them finding happiness and ease in their lives.
We have lost so much of the connection of what it is to be human and people get so brainwashed, distracted and lost in a world that is designed to keep us following along blindly and on autopilot. All driven by profit.
Perfect bodies.
Pretty faces.
Nice cars.
Houses.
Money.
Clothes.
Fame.
Stuff.
When something shifts in us and we start to become conscious and question everything we thought we knew, and begin to see the world and life in a completely different way, it leads us down a path of no return. Once we reconnect to who we are at a deeper level and regain perspective we start to ask that question and it can cause anxiety and a lot of overthinking...
‘What is my true purpose?’
‘How can I find deeper meaning in my life?’
There are some people in the world who find theirs early in life, but for the majority it unfolds and becomes clear throughout our life’s journey if we make a conscious effort to stay true to ourselves and continue to learn and evolve.
The struggle part becomes extremely challenging for those who really true care, want to make an impact and feel they are here to be a bigger part of change in the midst of this unknown. The solution is so simple my lovely humans!
We are first and foremost humans.
You need to make your purpose and ‘job’ each and every day to being a kind, compassionate, helpful, encouraging, positive, supportive, and generous human.
While your specific purpose unfolds over time you don’t have to sit in a space of confusion, overwhelm, over-thinking and sadness.
Don’t feel your impact and ability to live a wonderful life has to be grandiose or monumental.
You can make the conscious commitment to raise your vibration and be a part of something beautiful that absolutely everyone can be a member of. It costs nothing, there are no memberships, no tests, no qualifications, no levels, and no joining fees.
Lightworker. This is your foundation for living a good life and feeling like you are a part of something more, which allows you to contribute in a way that makes you feel good and gives your life meaning while your unique path reveals itself. It will honestly transform your moods, your life, the people around you, your relationships, your work, your health, and get you feeling passionate about life and the impact you can make.
Don’t forget that lightwork can be as simple as just living your own best life.
Life is supposed to be fun. A wonderful, ever-changing, challenging, interesting and happy experience.
Let it be that.
Keep it simple.
Be the light.
For yourself.
For the world.
18.11.2018
18.11.2018
While watching one of my favourite shows the other night I found myself in tears.
I often feel like a failure.
If I had of known what health and fitness would have become 22 years ago I doubt I would have followed that path.
I get so lost in what to do and where to start. I want to do it all.
The pain, hurt and sadness in the world makes me want to help. An animal is in pain or I see someone care and heal one that is suffering (like the most amazing soul Dr Noel Fitzpatrick, who truly puts the human in humanity) and I want to be able to heal. I’ve considered studying animal medicine.
I see a young person hurting, alone or feeling lost in the world and I want to stand with them and be their human to help them light the way on their path. I’ve considered studying social and youth work.
I see people who are ill, in pain or suffering and I want to be able to heal. I’ve considered studying nursing and medicine.
I see elderly who see who are on their way to the next life and I want to sit with them, listen to them and show them they are valued. I’ve considered studying aged care or within palliative care.
I see the environmental destruction and I struggle to understand why still so many of us as a collective don’t care enough or feel that deep pain when seeing the absolute beauty of earth being damaged. I’ve considered studying environmental science.
I see people who are so sad, are struggling, who need support, guidance and someone to listen and care and I wish for everyone to feel valued and how life is a gift and that they matter more than they will ever know. I’ve considered studying psychology.
I see lack of common sense in general and want to be able to really influence and be a part of change. I’ve considered studying politics.
I know I appear to be so strong, happy, courageous and independent (and I am), but the paradox of my entire self is that I am at the same time a lost and shattered soul. I struggle constantly with the world and humanity. I love humans but at the same time hate humanity. I love and see the best in people but at the same time I absolutely hate society and often don’t know how to be a part of the world.
I try to be social and involved but the majority of the time I honestly much rather the simplicity of being at home with my husband and dogs.
I know I’m eternally good and try my best but I also battle my deep thinking mind that tells me that I am a failure and I should have done more to help.
I’m not depressed or suicidal so please don’t be concerned, however it took me a long time to make sense of this feeling of wanting to ‘go home’ and that I don’t belong here.
I am so grateful for the gift of being a lifelong leaner as I honestly, without a doubt, believe that reading and my insatiable desire to learn, grow myself, and build my mind to know more has been what has saved me; along with music, the little bits of beauty left in the world of people doing wonderful things, and of course my husband and dogs.
Eventually I do think I want to disappear off the grid in favour of the simple life, and with a small meaningful role in society or job that adds value to the world in some way.
A deeper way, not surface.
Ambivalence
Ambivalence.
Why do we have to be one, or another?
Why can’t we be a realist and still be a visionary?
Why can’t we love money yet still live a simple life?
Why can’t we believe in both holistic living and modern medicine?
Why can’t we believe in science and the real world?
Why can’t we have a typical ‘job’ but also have a side income?
Why can’t we be positive and happy but also have days of sadness and general low feelings?
Why can’t we love people but love to be alone?
Why can’t we be a dreamer and still live in the physical world?
Why can’t we believe in science as well as our own intuition?
We really don’t have to choose between options and situations in most of daily lives like the world seems to imply. Duality can be beautiful.
Don’t believe in ego based fear or be pulled into promoting ideologies that demand 'you are either with me or against me'. This may seem like a form of strength and building a community of 'like-minded' people, but realise it is just another form of hate and division.
Like the little girl says in the taco add when the family were arguing over soft or hard taco shells.
Why can’t we do both?
Why can’t we do both?
Ambivalence.
Why do we have to be one, or another?
Why can’t we be a realist and still be a visionary?
Why can’t we love money yet still live a simple life?
Why can’t we believe in both holistic living and modern medicine?
Why can’t we believe in science and the real world?
Why can’t we have a typical ‘job’ but also have a side income?
Why can’t we be positive and happy but also have days of sadness and general low feelings?
Why can’t we love people but love to be alone?
Why can’t we be a dreamer and still live in the physical world?
Why can’t we believe in science as well as our own intuition?
We really don’t have to choose between options and situations in most of daily lives like the world seems to imply. Duality can be beautiful.
Don’t believe in ego based fear or be pulled into promoting ideologies that demand 'you are either with me or against me'. This may seem like a form of strength and building a community of 'like-minded' people, but realise it is just another form of hate and division.
Like the little girl says in the taco add when the family were arguing over soft or hard taco shells.
Why can’t we do both?
Feeling Alone? Misunderstood?
Do you often feel alone and misunderstood by other people?
Believe me, you are not the only one who feels this way. There are many people out there who are misunderstood and even underestimated by others because of certain personality traits. Paradoxically, these individuals are usually much more talented, intelligent and deep than those who reject them. Still, being uninterested in popular things along with being too reserved and introspective may make you appear a sort of freak to the mediocre minds.
It’s all because human beings tend to be cautious and judgemental towards those who live, think and behave differently. So if you don’t share the interests and beliefs of the majority, you will probably face misunderstanding and rejection at some point in your life.
Some may judge you for being too quiet, unfriendly or aloof; others may believe that you are a weirdo because you are passionate about things they cannot understand. It’s not uncommon when even your close ones, such as your parents or your partner, seem to misinterpret your lifestyle and underestimate your passions. No need to say that this can be much more painful than the lack of understanding from people you are not so close to.
So what can you do when you feel alone and misunderstood?
1. Accept the fact that deep people rarely have the privilege to be truly understood by others.
Sometimes, the best way to stop worrying about being misunderstood is to accept it as a reality you cannot change. You need to realize that other people have a different perspective on what’s right or wrong, good or bad, interesting or boring. Unfortunately, most of us don’t even try to actually understand someone – we are too quick to judge because it’s much easier.
So instead of holding grudges and being mad at the world, accept it as a fact and move on. Remember the quote by James Blanchard Cisneros: ‘Once you awaken, you will have no interest in judging those who sleep.’
2. Seek to connect with the right people instead of trying to become more likable to the wrong ones.
It’s pointless to try to connect with people who cannot recognize the depth of your mind and personality in the first place. You will inevitably face misunderstanding and, as a result, will feel alone and disappointed.
The truth is that only a deep individual can appreciate and understand another deep individual. So seek to make connections with people you resonate with and who have a similar level of consciousness.
A good start would be to find individuals who share the same interests with you. Let’s say you are passionate about literature – so why not join a local poetry club. It may be a difficult task if you are socially awkward, but the presence of interesting people who have a common ground with you will eventually make it easier to start a conversation with some of them. You will see how many deep people you will meet and, who knows, some of them may make really great friends.
3. Follow your passion no matter what others think.
The only thing that truly matters is to find your purpose in life and build your lifestyle around it. While your passions and interests may be unpopular, they will eventually help you find your place in life and will fill your existence with meaning. So don’t worry if your dreams and priorities don’t seem “cool” to other people and stop seeking their approval.
I know that it’s much easier said than done, but as soon as you find yourself and your path in life, you will realize that people’s opinion is the last thing that should bother you. Basically, it’s the need to be likable and socially acceptable that makes many of us unhappy (and especially those who are different from the rest).
Finally, remember that it’s okay to feel alone and detached from the world and people from time to time. Individuals with a deep personality are particularly prone to these feelings because modern society is driven by ignorance and superficiality. So it makes perfect sense why they may feel like misfits no one really understands and appreciates. However, it’s not like this and be sure that the right people will see your personality in all its beauty and will appreciate you for what you are.
Anna LeMind (writer for ‘The Learning Mind’. I really enjoy reading her articles/blogs)
https://www.learning-mind.com/feel-alone-and-misunderstood/comment-page-1/?platform=hootsuite
Care without obsession. The case for common sense.
Care without obsession.
The case for common sense.
We have literally become a society of extreme behaviours and thoughts. All or nothing. It’s seems like over the years common sense is becoming less and less common. The ability to think for ourselves, aka ‘critical thinking skills’, has become a lot less common. We are becoming more and more a bunch of ‘followers’ in a world of ‘this’ or ‘that’. Full stop. No middle ground.
1. Think climate change. The world is going to explode and blow up. We are all doomed.
OR it’s all a hoax, a big scam, and load of bullshit.
Could we not acknowledge the data, appreciate that we can do better in respect to how we treat our planet, and make some changes to our behaviours as humanity, and make a conscious effort to care whilst not living in complete fear, lowering our collective vibration through panic, and taking away any joy in life because we are all freaking out about doomsday.
2.People become obsessed with sustainability and riddled with anger, self-righteousness and anxiety around every single action in their daily life and the effort level of everyone else in comparison to their ‘benchmark’ of what is acceptable.
OR I don’t give a shit, it’s not my problem, not interested, what I do is no-ones business, and it doesn’t make a difference anyway.
Could we not all make efforts to use less plastics (especially single use), recycle, reduce while at that same time not sitting around judging others on our high horse and getting so consumed and obsessed with the message that we forget to actually have some fun and live our lives.
3. Animal agriculture is destroying the world and if you eat animal products you are a heartless person who doesn’t give a fuck while I’m sitting here in all my rightness and woke-ness.
OR let’s gorge ourselves and over consume, because it’s ‘my right’ with no respect for the consequences of our actions and the impacts on the world and animals through our choices.
Could we not all make efforts to eat a mostly plant based, eat sensible portions of the foods we enjoy, with some animal protein and dairy if you enjoy it, be conscious the foods you eat and how they are sourced, listen to our intuition, and stop eating more than our share through greed.
4. Everyone is either on or off a diet. If you eat that food or drink this, you are literally going to get cancer and die so let’s gets so obsessed with ‘health’ and ‘wellness’ that we have so much anxiety we can now no longer enjoy our lives or social events.
OR let’s just eat everything and as much as we can and complain about how crap we feel, lack of energy, our body weight, look for the quickest fix , and then blame it on everything else, cue celebrity’s, influencers, social media, etc aside from our own choices.
How about we all just eat a balanced diet, built around the foods we enjoy, focus on whole foods, discretionary foods in moderation, be more conscious of our food choices without being riddled with anxiety, fear, and obsession about every little morsel you eat.
5. The medical industry is corrupt, all about money, and plotting to kill us so don’t listen to doctors or medical advice and just cure all disease naturally with food and natural therapies.
OR let’s just ignore basic health and lifestyle with no self awareness or responsibility for our choices and pressure doctors to cure our self inflicted health issues by loading ourselves full of prescription drugs and rely on surgery and pills with no respect for our bodies.
Could we not all take a sensible approach to nutrition, keep active, pay attention to our lifestyle habits, and use a balance of holistic treatments where you feel suitable and relevant, while taking appropriate medical advice and where required and recommended by trained professionals incorporate prescription medications or medical procedures/treatments.
6. Social media is terrible, ruins lives and makes people feel crap about themselves and influencers are responsible for all the problems in my life.
OR let’s live our lives completely glued to our damn screens 24/7 because we are so disengaged in our own reality that we can’t live without it and must know what everyone else is doing so we can know what to wear, eat, think, and believe.
Could we not all get back to actually living our own lives and connecting with the real world and people, sitting with our own thoughts so we can form our own opinions and recognize our own individuality while using social media in a sensible way that adds value to our lives.
7. If you use this cleaning product, skincare or this packaging you are being exposed to harmful ingredients that without a doubt you are going to get cancer, body mutations and die. And you are also destroying the environment.
OR who cares about any of it, I’m not paying extra, fuck any new research and information, and fuck the environment as it’s all bull shit anyway.
Could we not all be conscious of the products we use around the house and on our skin and pay attention to scientific recommendations without jumping on scare mongering band wagons whilst being riddled with anxiety and fear about every.single.damn.little ingredient that it consumes your entire existence.
I don’t know if it’s just me but sometimes when I look on social media and in the news I am quite disillusioned in how as a society we can be so brain washed to be obsessively ‘on a side’. There literally seems to be any ‘middle ground’ anymore. No flexibility. No perspective.
When did it become so black and white. When did we forget to look at information from all sides of the table, weigh up the pros/cons, consider all other possibilities and from their make our own educated opinion, whilst also appreciating we don’t have all the answers in this incredibly diverse world.
Why can’t we balance what ‘science’ tells us with common sense and the ‘real world’.
Why have we felt the need to have to become so divided and to the point of uncompromising allegiance?
As the famed quote says ‘just because I don’t agree with you doesn’t mean I hate you’.
Lack of critical thinking skills is becoming an issue more and more with the internet and social media as people look to the ‘pretty people’ for information, those who they like or seen nice, and don’t realise that they are typically targeted with information that confirms their existing beliefs.
It’s time to start moving back to a place of a sliding scale and not seeing, or trying, to live a life with everything in a state of all-or-nothing with no flexibility or appreciation of perspective. This mindset leads to a world full of people filled with fear, riddled with anxiety, and with a complete lack of freedom to grow and change as dogmatism results in communities of ‘stuck’ humans without the ability to enjoy life.
There is a big difference between ‘care’ and ‘obsession’.
My Posts
As I start posting more often and sharing my ‘notes’ I just want you all to remember that these are my ‘thoughts’, ‘ideas’ or ways to see the world or make sense of the life going on around me☺️
I don’t write what’s right or wrong, just what’s fits with me in this moment of time. It may stay true, it may change in 2 days, 2 months, 2 years or 2 decades.
My goal is not to preach, necessarily teach or tell you to take what I say as gospel. I only post to share my view of this life and the world as how I see and navigate it. The only goal is to maybe give a new, alternative or possibly better perspective/understanding.
Writing for me organizes my thoughts. I have an EXTREMELY busy mind. I would say at the highest end of the spectrum possible🤪Marcus often looks at me and says he gets tired thinking about what my brain is thinking about haha
I have been this way, for as long as I can remember. I am naturally very inquisitive. I like knowledge and learning, and these days mostly in just whatever it is that seems to catch my minds interest at any given time. I also like to live a happy life. Looking at my everyday experiences and what goes on in the world around me allows me to think deeply and use the information to find peace in any situation and just really live life.
I actually figured out that I get really overwhelmed with too many people and don’t really want a big following or crowd. It made sense to me as why I resisted the online social media fitness world for so long. I didn’t truly deeply want to be ‘famous’. Many people tried to help me build a business and brand online, commenting "you could be as big as ‘this person’ or ‘that person’" etc, just do this, post that, shorten your captions, dumb it down a bit, show more of your body etc. The truth of it was that I never really desired to be any kind of role model or celebrity, or whatever else your refer to it. The only true desire was to help people and try to make their lives better in some way.
The best advice I can give for anyone is to really commit time to reading a wide range of books across many different topics, get involved personal development events, and instead of relying on social media as your entire source of information, spend time researching more about anything that peaks your interest by learning from various sources.
Try not to get consumed entirely with one point of view and always challenge yourself to still consider the opposing views in any circumstance. I like to be able to argue almost everything from both sides of the table to ensure I keep myself conscious of what beliefs I am taking on.
I often read books where I wholeheartedly agree and love an authors thoughts and beliefs around a topic, yet still find a paragraph, chapter or social media post that I don’t agree with. I just consider their ideas and then pass over them if they don’t align with me personally. I don’t hate them, disregard their intelligence, wipe them out of my existence😉I continue to appreciate the parts of their mind that add value to my own and regardless of how much I love or respect that person, never take on beliefs or values that aren’t authentic to me.
So keep reading along my ramblings🤪 if you enjoy them, consider them, absorb the parts that fit, and simply disregard the rest. Feel free to write any thoughts, ideas, or perspectives that you have discovered whether you agree or disagree. I find reading the comments on certain social media pages super mind opening as so many regular people who are not in the position of ‘thought leader’ etc have some truly epic knowledge and wisdom to share.
Why Must We Justify Our Imperfections?
Why do we have to justify our ‘imperfections’?
We see these posts all the time now from influencers and fitness accounts.
The posting of inspirational photos showing our ‘bad side’, which let’s be honest most photos show such minimal imperfections. Someone posts a photo and points out how they have stomach rolls in certain positions, cellulite in certain lighting, bad skin, etc and write a caption to purportedly make others feel better.
I started to wonder why we are not comfortable in just posting the perceived ‘flaws’ with absolutely NO justification or explanation of these imperfections.
Isn’t that the real truth, actual confidence and the most candid way in helping others?
Posting a photo that shows a part of our body that society deems as something we should ‘fix’ and not actually saying anything.
Wouldn’t that be more inspirational and progressive?
It’s like we say and write all the ‘right’ things but we still have to hide behind the cover of ‘I’m here to prove to you I’m not perfect and look at how genuine I am by sharing my ‘bad side’ with you’, BUT ‘I just need to make sure you know it is my bad side’. Instead of just posting the photo and letting it be. Not drawing attention to it looking for comments about how real you are. Not feeling you need to explain your flaws and making sure people understand it’s not your best picture. Just posting the not perfect photo and carrying on without worrying about what others will think or assume.
Isn’t that real truth?
Look I’m not saying people who post this type of content have ulterior motives but I do have to be honest that every time I see them now the majority of the time I just feel they are fabricated. Just posting the photos, without any mention of society’s perceived flaws under a pretence of ‘being real’ seems more sincere to me. Could it be considered that when we still feel the need to give acknowledgement to society that these are 'actual flaws' we are not really dispelling these long held toxic beliefs?
If we are really sharing it for change and social impact as opposed to our desire to capture ‘likes’ and be seen in a ‘good light’, is it not best to just post it with no justification about the ‘imperfect’ picture?
Is it really fake?
People get so opinionated on what people sell, promote, or recommend online.
‘Stupid fake influencers’
‘Stupid person just trying to make money’
The thing is though, during some point of our lives we ALL have sold something, or been involved in sales of some kind.
“But they don’t even use it, or like it” I hear people say.
So fucking what!
When you go into a clothing store do you think the sales person loves absolutely everything?
Of course not!
They are there to sell and service you for what YOU may want or what YOU are looking for.
Is that fake?
Should they lose their job?
Should they be criticized or denigrated in how they go about making their money?
What about when you go into a restaurant.
Do you think the service people eat or love every single thing on the menu?
Of course not!
They are there to sell and service you for what you may want or what you are looking for.
Is that fake?
Should they lose their job?
Should they be criticized or denigrated in how they go about making their money?
People sell to make money.
It’s a job.
Consider this; when you go to your job or work place (even if you don’t ‘technically’ sell, you still SELL your service), do you agree with absolutely everything that goes on?
Treatment of staff, hours, wages, procedures, lists of duties, how you are treated ?
Of course not!
You are there to sell your service for what is expected within your job description, even when it’s not all in 100% alignment for you.
Is that fake?
Should you lose their job? Should you be criticized or denigrated in how you go about making your money?
‘Working’ and being engaged in life is better than people sitting on their asses gaining benefits from our tax paying money.
We have to appreciate that not everyone has the dream or is cut out, to be doctor, accountant, teacher, manager, emergency services, electrician etc. and that’s ok!
Some people have a different vision for their life and work, and that’s ok.
We aren’t all supposed to like the same things or want the same lives.
If we did then society would collapse.
Every single human is needed to do their thing, in their own way, in the right time.
The world has changed. And is changing. The online world has opened up so many incredible opportunities for the new generations, so who are we to belittle and judge people who take advantage of the new way? Maybe ask the question why it bothers you so much?
It’s time we all stepped up a little individually as a society and started taking a bit more responsibility for our lives in all areas if we are not fulfilled, in place of sitting around wasting our time on what other people choose to do with their lives. This movement towards spewing hate, complaining and blaming everyone and everything else, is ultimately going to do you personally more harm than good.
No one on social media is being forced to follow.
No one on social media is being forced to buy.
No one on social media is being forced to believe.
In fact no one is being forced to do anything.
It’s time to start changing our focus from trying to take down others, to instead teaching children and teenagers (and adults) how to follow their own path, and make their own decisions, while allowing the world to show us different ideas, perspectives, and paths.
If we don’t start to realise the world is full of choices, and accept that they may not align with what is true for you, we will eventually end up with a world full of really oversensitive and irrational people.
People who can’t think for themselves independently, can’t stand up for themselves, can’t self-reflect and learn, can’t experience challenges to lead to growth, or can’t start choosing our own life by seeing all different types of people and different ways to be happy.
There is so much nastiness, judgement and opinions towards online influencers, yet I don’t see anyone in and around shopping centre stores or restaurants abusing people about selling products that they don’t personally use or believe in
I mean honestly, what is the difference between standing in a store, restaurant or shopping centre selling a product or service, or selling it online?
Inspiration?
I’ve never been a flashy person or overly obsessed with materialistic stuff.
Of course I have had moments in my life where I was influenced by society’s marketing in a way that drove me to purchase things I didn’t truly need, or I guess you could say ‘actually want’.
There are also occasions I have bought the designers shoes, watches and bags because I genuinely loved them, not for the logo but the item wholeheartedly.
The importance is the ‘intention’ behind purchasing.
Social media has definitely amplified the need to buy things that are ‘on trend’, in fashion, and that ‘everyone’ else has. During my teens, twenties and early thirties when I bought more ‘stuff’, I would always buy the things in stores I ‘loved’. Of course there is always some influence to a degree by what you see day to day and what you are exposed to across your life.
The other day a girl at the newsagent commented on my hair which as usual was the day where I hadn’t made much effort but just threw it up in a pineapple and tied on a bandanna to hold all the ‘bits’ in (from my constant short/long hair adventures). It made me think about how I only really ever get these kind of comments on my clothing, hair or make up when I just completely ‘do me’. You know, just exactly what I feel for that day regardless how much it ‘makes sense’ or mismatches. It’s usually when I am wearing things I love that are at this point 10 years old, something I randomly grabbed when I wasn’t particularly looking for anything special, or something that definitely isn’t in ‘fashion’ at that moment.
When we are constantly trying to ‘fit in’ and be the same as everyone else it really hides our true self, and it doesn’t truly inspire.
Inspiration comes from uniqueness and seeing things from your own perspective.
Inspiration is not ‘following along’.
Inspiration is not ‘the same.
Inspiration is not ‘fitting in’.
Inspiration is not ‘on trend’, in fashion, or ‘on point’.
Inspiration is not doing exactly what ‘everyone else’ is.
Inspiration is unique.
When I think about what inspires me it is people who are simply themselves.
Not the same, NOR INTENTIONALLY DIFFERENT.
It’s not about trying to stand out, just like it’s not about fitting in.
It’s simply about truth.
If you didn’t see it on social media how would you do it?
With access to so many thoughts, images, opinions, information, products, if you just sat with your own self what would you dress like, who would you be, and what would you do?
I’ve bought $30 sneakers and $1000 sneakers.
I’ve bought $30 sneakers and $1000 sneakers.
Being in debt for the majority is buying things you can’t afford, because you are wanting things that ‘everyone else’ has, often not because you truly want them, or need them.
In a way I believe it is an act of desperation to fulfil a sense of ‘belonging’. The need to feel like you are a part of something because you are so fraught to ‘fill’ an empty emotional or spiritual space within.
There is nothing wrong with buying a car worth $1000 or $100000.
The problem is buying what you truly can’t afford.
I would rather own my car worth $1000, than drive a car that enslaved me with debt and ultimately resulted in me paying thousands of dollars of interest.
It must also be acknowledged that the ability to ‘afford’ includes more than just simply the money part of the equation.
There is so much more of a ‘price’ to be paid when living with mindless overspending and useless debt.
What has become so wrong living within your means and being proud of who you are and where you are currently at?
Why do we need to feel we need to show our friends, family, or the world what we have, but don’t ‘really’ have?
Where has our pride gone in acknowledging we are all at different income and financial levels and that is ok?
There is no difference to me in a person who loves their $30,000 job and drives a $1500 car that they own versus the person who drives the $30000 car that earns $120,000, while both doing the job they love or using that job to work towards a better financial position.
As a society we should be focused on everyone finding a place of their own truth.
If you want more money and the more expensive things and you love your job that brings you those things and that’s YOUR truth, we can smile and celebrate you.
But at the same time we should be equally celebrating and smiling for those who chose a job, and the income that brings them what they want which may not be the big expensive stuff.
What’s so wrong with living a simple life if it feels right and brings you joy?
What is so wrong with average anyway?
(PS - I’m not referring to the debt in which you borrow money to invest where you can potentially multiply your investment profits and achieve your wealth goals sooner).
Checking in and updating ☺️🌻
I didn’t post too much the past year or so on social media.
Or even the year before.
There was no particular reason other that that it just simply wasn’t a part of my daily life and focus.
Flipping through my 'notes' in my phone I noticed that I have a HEAP of ‘writings’ from last year that I am thinking I will share many of them over the next couple of weeks. I likely won’t post them all, just the ones I think may add value, perspective or challenge someone’s thoughts (in a positive way).
I really love writing my thoughts as my mind randomly makes sense of things from the continuous flow of stuff that comes into my mind. In most cases I only like to post things that I feel can be helpful to people. I don’t pull any feelings of self-respect or ego based stuff from the online world at all so that is probably one of the reasons I simply 'disappear' at times. I am definitely not implying that is the reason everyone is online. Sure there are many reasons why people are active online, keep in touch with family, business, or passion for a message and cause, but I do think validation is a big part of it for most people.I guess for me I just follow my intuition and when it feels time to re-appear and share my thoughts, I do, and the rest of the time I just enjoy life in the flow of what feels good for me☺️
I have a really balanced relationship and opinion on social media. It is one thing I am grateful for as I only use it in a way that adds to my life, and others (hopefully). As much as the internet is full of shit lol, I still think it has some really cool shit 😜I love reading other people’s ideas, beliefs, opinions and watching behaviour of humans (another job I would have loved, psychology).
I am also super passionate about critical thinking (may be due to the teacher in me😉) and I do believe that with the fast rise of social media it is a skill set that has been largely lost in society, yet it is one of the most valuable skills you could have in life. It really brings about a more calm, rational and peaceful existence being able to see things from all angles and finding a place of what is truth for you, regardless of where others stand (and not getting consumed with anger and hatred for those who are different).
As most of you have probably noticed over the year I don’t post to get people ‘on my side’, or to take on my beliefs or opinions, but more so to challenge people’s thoughts in a really small way. Hopefully inspirit them to think about things in a different way that enables them to bring about a better life through perspective.
Most of my ‘notes’ which become the posts, simply came about through me challenging my own thoughts when reading about certain topics, watching how many people behave when specific ideas get exposure in the media, and in a lot of cases offering a different perspective to what most people ‘jump on the bandwagon’.
I also like to encourage people to assess how they react to the world, what goes on in their life and their experiences to see how they can maybe views things a little differently, find more peace, learn something new, or find better ways to manage their own thoughts. I don’t expect it all to resonate with you, and often times I even think, ‘does this make sense?’ haha.
A final note. These days with algorithms I notice I RARELY see posts from people I actually love and who are my friends, so if you do like reading my stuff jump on my profile each day or comment so you can see. I know I must be a real pain in the ass for those who do appreciate my posts and most would give up if they kept 'checking in' lol 🤪 I truly miss the early social media days where everything just came in order as people posted. SO.MUCH.EASIER! 🙄
I hope you enjoy them and they can impact you in some positive or beneficial way xx
Why is it that we have such high expectations of others, but have so little responsibility ourselves?
You want the millionaires to donate hundreds of thousands of dollars. My question is why don’t you?
Let’s be real. Tragedies are happening everywhere, everyday all around the world, some just get more attention and media exposure. So what are we all doing in preparation for the next disaster?
We all care so much when there is collective attention on a tragedy, but what are we doing the rest of the days in preparation to make a difference to catastrophes?
For the majority. Nothing.
We do though expect others to take more responsibility than we do of ourselves.
Why is that?
Why wait for others when you can be the one to do what you want to see?
We want others to donate large sums because they are rich and have the means to, but if we are so passionate about contribution then why aren’t we personally stepping up and donating the hundreds of thousands, or millions? Many might answer, because we don’t have the means to. I would propose that because someone else worked hard, took risks and made sacrifices in order to earn lots of money and be in a position of large financial wealth, how does that give US the right to dictate how they spend it? If we want to be in a position to see the change we want in the world, it is up to us to take self-responsibility and go out there and work hard in whatever way to create financial abundance for ourselves so we don’t have to put that expectation on others.
If we are so passionate about our environment, people, and animals around the world why aren’t we today as individuals getting to work? Start your own business, write a book, sell your art, buy a franchise, sell an ebook, offer coaching, invest, find a networking marking company, get a second job, for the SOLE purpose of putting yourself in a better position to help the next time crisis occurs. If it means that much to you and you expect others to meet your standards, then where is the self-responsibility? Wouldn’t it make more sense to get yourself in a better financial situation and be in a more powerful position to have the choice to give the contribution you expect of others?
I see so much time being invested into ranting and raving, complaining and blaming, yet so few are actually doing something and taking actions to put themselves in a position to be the change they want to see in the world.
The same thing can be said for people creating drama and judgement around people continuing ‘business as usual’ amidst the bushfires.
Yet, you want everyone to donate, donate, donate?
Give more money, let’s donate etc, but definitely don’t promote your business during this crisis. It doesn’t make sense when the actual businesses are what provides the means to donate the money everybody is screaming for.
I saw a shared post the other day listing ‘billionaires’ with $0 next to their names implying that they had not donated to the bushfires. It has already been shared over 1000 times. I wonder how many people have actually spoken to these individuals personally. I wonder how many of these people have actually viewed these people’s bank accounts. I’d be pretty confident in saying not one. So what other purpose do these posts serve other than to ignite anger and separation? We need to start questioning the validity to all things we see and hear before jumping on bandwagons that don’t contribute anything worthy or positive to society, or our own lives moving forward.
For me personally, I have learnt to see everything through a lens of ‘if I want to see $100,000 donated then it’s up to me, or what am I doing to make that happen’. I don’t see the responsibility as anyone else’s but my own. I don’t need to rant and rave at certain people of groups, or wait and hope for others to take the action I want to see. It’s always up to me!
Why does the responsibility lie so much with others?
Why is it that we have such high expectations of others, but have so little responsibility ourselves?
#thoughtsfortheday
Everyone cares, copes and contributes in their own ‘right way’.
Everyone cares, copes and contributes in their own ‘right way’.
Amidst the chaos that is going on in our country right now we need to remember to that everyone handles hurt and tragedy in different ways. How you deal with crisis is right for you, but that doesn’t mean it is right for everyone. We are ALL right in what that feels for us emotionally and spiritually.
There is so much love, kindness and concern being shown which is a testament to humanity, but there also seems to be a lot of judgement and self-righteousness.
If being the loudest voice, posting continuously, and sharing the images of the destruction to draw attention to what is happening feels ok for you, then do that. However we must also appreciate and respect those that don’t want to ‘post’ on social media, or those who choose to go on with their daily lives. It doesn’t mean they don’t care, or are not helping in their own way, or contributing behind the scenes. Realise that for many people images and talking about these kinds of things is distressing, and they are dealing with what is going on in their own unique way. No-one deserves to be judged for their way of ‘survival’.
With all this talk about compassion, empathy and awareness let’s not forgot to have that for EVERYONE.
We must realise that there are also other things happening in the world. Whilst the bushfires have been on my mind literally EVERYDAY for the past couple of months, (and with the escalation of the circumstances the past 2 weeks consuming my mind), today I had something else on my mind. I accidentally saw a video pop up on my timeline that I wasn’t prepared for. It hadn’t yet been covered with the warning ‘see video’, and was footage of a puppy being slammed into the ground and stomped. I honestly gasped out loud as it took my fucking breath away! Then I fucking cried. I would not have chosen to see that footage today as I do feel affected deep down emotionally about what has been happening these past few months. If there had been a direct charity link to what happened to that puppy I would have donated in that moment, and not to another bushfire cause. That doesn’t mean I don’t care or that I chose 'wrong', it simply means that although the scale of the bushfire crisis is next level, there are still soooooo many other people, children, and animals suffering right now in whatever circumstances. Wherever our focus and concern lies in any given moment does not have to be justified.
There are many things people ‘care’ about so we can’t assume certain people, high profile or not, don’t care based on the little glimpse of what we think we can see of their lives on social media. There are just so many things right now to care about and contribute to the world. The way a person copes, cares, or contributes is valid, regardless if it is the same passion and action you have around these things.
Just because a person doesn’t post about the current situation in Australia doesn’t equal that they don’t care. In fact they may even care more than many, who are in some part of their ‘activism’ and ‘morality’ are partly posting it for the likes, engagement, build their followers, and to look like a ‘good person’. How do you judge that and make that assumption?
Actions don’t always speak the loudest. Intentions behind the actions do, and these are mostly impossible to truly see.
So what if people are trying to simply ‘go on’, and whilst acknowledging the tragedy still want to live their lives. So what if people post selfies, continue to do business, enjoy themselves, spend money, travel and go about their daily activities. How do we know the person posting the ‘perceived’ selfishness and lack of compassion haven’t in fact donated hundreds, or thousands, or more money, or volunteered, or supported someone impacted in some way? Maybe they don’t have the words or are struggling with the enormity of it all, that seeing another photo or re-posting the horrific images is just too much for them to process right now. We can’t expect the whole world to curl up in a ball helpless with no hope or forward motion.
When I see posts or comments judging others as a part of their own ‘doing good’ message, it’s unfortunately very apparent to me the goal is to draw attention as a comparison and to literally garner praise and adoration. It’s disappointing to see these posts and comments are first and foremost about highlighting the good they are doing (‘look at me in all my glory and how honourable I am’) and gaining praise and adoration, whilst throwing shade on others efforts.
Many business owners make no profit and their owners are financially stressed. So them donating ‘profits’ or a ‘percentage’ may currently be their only honest, well-intentioned and genuine way of giving something. Who are we to discern. We aren’t privy to everyone’s TRUE financial position.
Could it be possible that many of the celebrities and influencers are doing their part behind the scenes and aren’t looking for praise, recognition and the glory? Perhaps they have made big donations and other contributions elsewhere that we know nothing about? Who are we to judge what others do as acceptable.
When you are doing ‘your good’ why is it necessary to draw comparisons around how others do ‘their good’?
I mean, can you really claim to still care if you post photos of burnt and injured animals yet still eat meat from farmed animals that have been killed by mostly cruel ways, or let’s be honest in many circumstances have lived a somewhat tortured life and at some point been exposed to pain and suffering?
How about this one, can you really claim to still care if you post updates about humans suffering and the struggles people are enduring when in your daily life you are manipulative, nasty and don’t always treat people too kindly?
Why can’t we just allow everyone to care and cope in their own way?
Why is it that we sit in all our self-righteousness and judge others on how they feel best to contribute?
Could it be that when we offer our help, yet at the same time shame others or try to shine the light on others efforts is a way of showing deep issues around the why and what we are ‘really’ contributing OR our TRUE intention around our actions?
How do we become so high and mighty to sanctimoniously promote ourselves as doing a good deed simply because we are more vocal about it. I’m sure there are those who are screaming the loudest and criticising others as they don’t act and do THEIR good in the same manner, behind the curtains may only donate minimal.
Everyone’s efforts matter. Everyone’s good deeds count. It doesn’t matter if their form of coping and care is not the exact same as yours.
We must understand that there are also people who would prefer to be a light right now amongst so much of darkness being shared. While creating awareness of how bad the situation really is, we still desperately need those people who are posting about their holidays, their daily successes, positive vibes, and their joy. Don’t overlook the importance of some people only sharing their happy thoughts and energy. It is so needed right now, even if it doesn’t resonate with you personally. We mustn’t forget that many people come to the internet and social media as a place to find encouragement, as an escape, and to bring about a distraction from the tragic things happening in their lives and around the world. We are all needed to show up in our own unique way in this world and having some happiness and beauty in our feeds is still required. We as humans can’t survive on hopelessness, and we can’t bring our best to the world if we just pound ourselves every moment with despair.
I chose these images as they are from around Broulee and in the Snowy Mountains. I grew up in Canberra so spent a lot of my childhood in these beautiful places. The past two years living in Sydney Marcus and I have been spending most of our weekends in the van at Broulee and in the surrounding Batemans Bay areas. We have breakfast in Mogo almost every time we visit. It truly is the most gorgeous area and I can’t wait for the calm to return so we can get back down there as soon as it is possible.
Helping and making a difference is not a competition or ‘scale’ of comparison to outshine or criticise others. Share, care, be, and make your impact without the need to use it as a way to be more noble and better than others. I hope we can all just do our best in the way that feels right for us and grant others the graciousness to do the same xx