Everyone cares, copes and contributes in their own ‘right way’.
Amidst the chaos that is going on in our country right now we need to remember to that everyone handles hurt and tragedy in different ways. How you deal with crisis is right for you, but that doesn’t mean it is right for everyone. We are ALL right in what that feels for us emotionally and spiritually.
There is so much love, kindness and concern being shown which is a testament to humanity, but there also seems to be a lot of judgement and self-righteousness.
If being the loudest voice, posting continuously, and sharing the images of the destruction to draw attention to what is happening feels ok for you, then do that. However we must also appreciate and respect those that don’t want to ‘post’ on social media, or those who choose to go on with their daily lives. It doesn’t mean they don’t care, or are not helping in their own way, or contributing behind the scenes. Realise that for many people images and talking about these kinds of things is distressing, and they are dealing with what is going on in their own unique way. No-one deserves to be judged for their way of ‘survival’.
With all this talk about compassion, empathy and awareness let’s not forgot to have that for EVERYONE.
We must realise that there are also other things happening in the world. Whilst the bushfires have been on my mind literally EVERYDAY for the past couple of months, (and with the escalation of the circumstances the past 2 weeks consuming my mind), today I had something else on my mind. I accidentally saw a video pop up on my timeline that I wasn’t prepared for. It hadn’t yet been covered with the warning ‘see video’, and was footage of a puppy being slammed into the ground and stomped. I honestly gasped out loud as it took my fucking breath away! Then I fucking cried. I would not have chosen to see that footage today as I do feel affected deep down emotionally about what has been happening these past few months. If there had been a direct charity link to what happened to that puppy I would have donated in that moment, and not to another bushfire cause. That doesn’t mean I don’t care or that I chose 'wrong', it simply means that although the scale of the bushfire crisis is next level, there are still soooooo many other people, children, and animals suffering right now in whatever circumstances. Wherever our focus and concern lies in any given moment does not have to be justified.
There are many things people ‘care’ about so we can’t assume certain people, high profile or not, don’t care based on the little glimpse of what we think we can see of their lives on social media. There are just so many things right now to care about and contribute to the world. The way a person copes, cares, or contributes is valid, regardless if it is the same passion and action you have around these things.
Just because a person doesn’t post about the current situation in Australia doesn’t equal that they don’t care. In fact they may even care more than many, who are in some part of their ‘activism’ and ‘morality’ are partly posting it for the likes, engagement, build their followers, and to look like a ‘good person’. How do you judge that and make that assumption?
Actions don’t always speak the loudest. Intentions behind the actions do, and these are mostly impossible to truly see.
So what if people are trying to simply ‘go on’, and whilst acknowledging the tragedy still want to live their lives. So what if people post selfies, continue to do business, enjoy themselves, spend money, travel and go about their daily activities. How do we know the person posting the ‘perceived’ selfishness and lack of compassion haven’t in fact donated hundreds, or thousands, or more money, or volunteered, or supported someone impacted in some way? Maybe they don’t have the words or are struggling with the enormity of it all, that seeing another photo or re-posting the horrific images is just too much for them to process right now. We can’t expect the whole world to curl up in a ball helpless with no hope or forward motion.
When I see posts or comments judging others as a part of their own ‘doing good’ message, it’s unfortunately very apparent to me the goal is to draw attention as a comparison and to literally garner praise and adoration. It’s disappointing to see these posts and comments are first and foremost about highlighting the good they are doing (‘look at me in all my glory and how honourable I am’) and gaining praise and adoration, whilst throwing shade on others efforts.
Many business owners make no profit and their owners are financially stressed. So them donating ‘profits’ or a ‘percentage’ may currently be their only honest, well-intentioned and genuine way of giving something. Who are we to discern. We aren’t privy to everyone’s TRUE financial position.
Could it be possible that many of the celebrities and influencers are doing their part behind the scenes and aren’t looking for praise, recognition and the glory? Perhaps they have made big donations and other contributions elsewhere that we know nothing about? Who are we to judge what others do as acceptable.
When you are doing ‘your good’ why is it necessary to draw comparisons around how others do ‘their good’?
I mean, can you really claim to still care if you post photos of burnt and injured animals yet still eat meat from farmed animals that have been killed by mostly cruel ways, or let’s be honest in many circumstances have lived a somewhat tortured life and at some point been exposed to pain and suffering?
How about this one, can you really claim to still care if you post updates about humans suffering and the struggles people are enduring when in your daily life you are manipulative, nasty and don’t always treat people too kindly?
Why can’t we just allow everyone to care and cope in their own way?
Why is it that we sit in all our self-righteousness and judge others on how they feel best to contribute?
Could it be that when we offer our help, yet at the same time shame others or try to shine the light on others efforts is a way of showing deep issues around the why and what we are ‘really’ contributing OR our TRUE intention around our actions?
How do we become so high and mighty to sanctimoniously promote ourselves as doing a good deed simply because we are more vocal about it. I’m sure there are those who are screaming the loudest and criticising others as they don’t act and do THEIR good in the same manner, behind the curtains may only donate minimal.
Everyone’s efforts matter. Everyone’s good deeds count. It doesn’t matter if their form of coping and care is not the exact same as yours.
We must understand that there are also people who would prefer to be a light right now amongst so much of darkness being shared. While creating awareness of how bad the situation really is, we still desperately need those people who are posting about their holidays, their daily successes, positive vibes, and their joy. Don’t overlook the importance of some people only sharing their happy thoughts and energy. It is so needed right now, even if it doesn’t resonate with you personally. We mustn’t forget that many people come to the internet and social media as a place to find encouragement, as an escape, and to bring about a distraction from the tragic things happening in their lives and around the world. We are all needed to show up in our own unique way in this world and having some happiness and beauty in our feeds is still required. We as humans can’t survive on hopelessness, and we can’t bring our best to the world if we just pound ourselves every moment with despair.
I chose these images as they are from around Broulee and in the Snowy Mountains. I grew up in Canberra so spent a lot of my childhood in these beautiful places. The past two years living in Sydney Marcus and I have been spending most of our weekends in the van at Broulee and in the surrounding Batemans Bay areas. We have breakfast in Mogo almost every time we visit. It truly is the most gorgeous area and I can’t wait for the calm to return so we can get back down there as soon as it is possible.
Helping and making a difference is not a competition or ‘scale’ of comparison to outshine or criticise others. Share, care, be, and make your impact without the need to use it as a way to be more noble and better than others. I hope we can all just do our best in the way that feels right for us and grant others the graciousness to do the same xx